Long Day

Good morning! Woke up to a sunny, somewhat white world. The boys all were getting ready to go out and play in the, according to Seth, centimeter of snow. They did, too. I decided to make rolled oats for them even though none of them requested it and when I called them in to eat, they were all down by the creek. Cedric had Kitty on his shoulders and it would have made a really cute picture if I’d had the camera with me and if I had been closer to them.

Currently, the wind is blowing and snow is swirling, sparkling in the sun. It’s quite pretty until you go outside and can’t breathe because the wind is either taking your breath away or filling your face with very small, frozen particles of snow.

Yesterday was quite a day. Oh my goodness. At 8:55 (approximately), I checked Facebook and saw a post that reminded me that there was a baby shower at 10:00 that I’d completely forgotten about. Well, not completely forgotten about but had completely convinced myself that it was next week (which isn’t the 23rd so I’m not sure how I convinced myself but I did; somehow). Next week is perhaps an even more wonderful thing happening but since it’s in Nevada and I’m here and there is no way I could afford to fly out there, I won’t be there. Which is very sad because it’s all about my very best friend in the world but it’s also very happy because it’s my very best friend in the world.

Anyway, I’d forgotten about this baby shower and so of course I did not have a ball made or even a bar of soap ready to go. I needed to hop in the shower and eat breakfast (I could have skipped breakfast but didn’t know that at the time). That left me with no time to do anything so I hopped in the bug and took off. I actually could have done something because I was 15 minutes early (was the first one there, actually). However, on the way, the battery light came on and I spent the 15 minutes attempting to call Paul to see what he suggested I do about it. He suggested I just drive home when the time came and if anything happened, call.

So, I enjoyed the shower and will forever be amazed at how differently I view life. Everything from childbirth and pregnancy to muffins. I’m not sure how it happened but I really just don’t feel like I completely fit in anywhere. I seriously want to cry sometimes.

When I left, the engine light was on, the battery light was on and the glo plug light was flashing. As I approached Gardner, the ABS and air bag lights came on. As I took the Pearson Blvd. exit, a bell dinged at me three times. As I drove along Pearson and turned onto South Main, I got dinged at more; it became a continuous thing—ding, ding, ding, ding... I turned on to Union and everything was pretty much the same. I turned on to 68 and some of the lights dimmed and some others came on. I didn’t get very far and I couldn’t go very fast so I pulled over to the side, thinking that I’d go as long as I could at whatever speed I could and it died. I called Paul.

We would hook up the jumper cables and the bug would start. Sometimes it wouldn’t go anywhere before it died again and we’d have to hook it back up. Sometimes it would go a dozen yards or so. It was nice the couple of times it got to the top of a hill and it would coast down and then the momentum would take it up a bit. After the first jump, Paul manned the bug and I did the van. He wanted to get it at least over the Hubbardston line because then we could tow it the rest of the way. As we were approaching Pitcherville, we saw Jack and Henry Foley’s dad walking their dog. Once we got turned onto Pitcherville, he helped to push it and then Paul hopped in and drove it as far as it would go. That took 50 minutes. Then we left the bug and went to get a tow strap and went back and towed the bug the rest of the way. It ended up taking an hour and thirty minutes to get me and the bug home from the shower. What a fun time that was.

Then Paul and I decided to take the boys with us to get potatoes. None of them wanted to go but sometimes we all have to do things that we don’t want. Cedric was downright belligerent about it and did his best to make the beginning of the trip and the time we spent getting loaded with potatoes as miserable for everyone else as possible. Seth and Joseph fell in love with the dog that lives on the farm; he is a very nice dog and loves to get attention.

Once we got to Bub’s and the boys got food and drink, they were all much happier. Especially Cedric. The boys all had chicken strips. There is a hot and cold bar with stuff like baked beans, French fries, beets, potato salad. French fries were the most popular at our table but all the chicken disappeared as well. When we left, there was snow swirling in the air and the way home was rather snowy. At times we were driving through what looked like the stars in Star Wars. I remember thinking how cool that looked when I was a kid but once I learned to drive, I found out how not fun it is driving through that cool stuff. It was very windy much of the time and there were a few places where the road was white. There were a few places where the road was very slick.

When we got home, the boys hurried and showered and finished watching “Captain America.” Pretty exciting. I’d been thinking about the whole pregnancy/birth/labor and doctor/medical system thing and started typing some of my thoughts last night. You’ll get them in a bit.

And that’s about it for yesterday.

Brigham Young once said, “Would you want doctors? Yes, to set bones. We should want a good surgeon for that, or to cut off a limb. But do you want doctors? For not much of anything else, let me tell you, only the traditions of the people lead them to think so; and here is a growing evil in our midst. It will be so in a little time that not a woman in all Israel will dare to have a baby unless she can have a doctor by her. I will tell you what to do, you ladies, when you find you are going to have an increase, go off into some country where you cannot call for a doctor, and see if you can keep it. I guess you will have it, and I guess it will be all right, too. Now the cry is, “Send for a doctor.” If you have a pain in the head, “Send for a doctor;” if your heel aches, “I want a doctor;” “my back aches, and I want a doctor.” The study and practice of anatomy and surgery are very good; they are mechanical, and are frequently needed. Do you not think it is necessary to give medicine sometimes? Yes...” (Journal of Discourses, volume 15, page 225. Accessed online at http://jod.mrm.org/1.)

There are times when I feel like I am in an ocean of humanity and there is not a single person I can relate to. Why? Because so many people buy in to the whole medical myth. And I don’t. To begin with, I am grateful for hospitals and doctors. Amena would not be alive today if not for a lovely, wonderful miracle worker in Albuquerque, New Mexico. Amena, Cedric and Seth would not be alive if not for many surgeons and other medical personnel. Am I grateful? You bet I am. However, in spite of being told that I needed to have a cesarean birth for Alisha, I managed to push her out. Interesting, that.

It is hard to adequately express my disappointment in humanity at times. Right now is one of those times. I get it that if you have placenta previa you ought to give birth in the hospital. I know how dangerous that can be and I would NEVER suggest that a woman who has it give birth at home or anywhere OTHER than a hospital. I get it that if you have high blood pressure you should give birth in the hospital. I get it, okay? I really do.

I also get that not all women have to give birth in a hospital. After my first, I successfully gave birth to seven more babies OUT of the hospital. Laura was born at home with and RN. Joanna was born at home with a CNM. Daniel was born at home with a MD and his RN nurse who was ready to sit for her midwifery exam. Amena was born at a birth center with a CPM. Cedric was born on the side of the road in our van on the way to the center. Seth was born at home before the CPM could get there. Joseph was born at home with a CPM. Do you get it? I get it.

Women buy into all the crap that they are told by those in the medical field. And I believe that those who work in the medical field buy into it as well. We spout ‘evidence-based’ medicine all the time and it seems pretty obvious that we do not indeed have it.

Do you get that a high-risk pregnancy does not mean that the labor and birth will be high-risk as well? It might, but the one doesn’t always follow the other. From a western-medical point of view, I was high risk for some of my pregnancies. With Joseph, I was 35 or older. That’s high-risk. With Joanna, Daniel, Amena, Cedric, Seth, and Joseph, I had asthma. That’s high-risk. With Seth, I had had six completed pregnancies resulting in live births and with Joseph, I had had seven. That’s high-risk. Do you get it? I do. Obviously, I am one heck of a baby-making-having machine. Hmmmm. If I were to have another baby, I would really be high-risk: over 35, asthma, overweight, grand multi-tip. Who knows what else they’d come up with. Do you get it? I don’t.

The thing that makes me so sad is that we believe everything we hear from the medical establishment. Do I agree with the quote from Brigham Young? Well, yes. And no. I do believe that we have gotten to the point where we don’t dare give birth without a doctor at our side (or at our feet, as the case usually is). I do believe that there are times when it would be foolish to give birth without a doctor at our side. HOWEVER, not all women need a doctor at every birth. I have been lucky. I get that. I also get that had I been giving birth in hospitals, I most likely would have ended up with a cesarean birth at some point or another. If with none of the others, probably with Amena due to the way labor developed (and which I have discussed elsewhere and so will not elaborate on here). Since Cedric was born in New Mexico and I do not know what the VBAC policies were twelve years ago, I am willing to say that there is at least a decent chance that he would have been born via repeat cesarean. I can tell you that had that happened, Seth and Joseph would have also because when we were in Idaho, the nearest hospital to allow VBACs was in western Spokane, Washington. I get that. Do you? Do you see how it could have been? Do you see how it would have been? I do.

There are times when pain killers can be of use in labor. If labor has been going on for a very long time and mama hasn’t been able to get any rest, she might need a break and something like an epidural might be just the ticket. In the occasional case when there is a true failure to progress, Pitocin and a pain med may be what is needed. If Pitocin is indeed used, chances are pretty good that mama is going to need something for the pain because the contractions tend to be so much stronger and often last longer and are usually more painful. If a cesarean birth ends up being necessary, pain meds are of course indicated. These things should be held back for those times when they are needed rather than as routinely used as they are now.

Tomorrow I would like to discuss epidurals. I actually would like to right now but this is already longer than I anticipated and you’d probably like a break. Therefore, have a wonderful rest of the day!